Mastering Value Building Behaviours For Effective Communication

What if the difference between thriving teams and struggling ones isn't talent, resources, or strategy, but something far more fundamental?

Every day, we witness the silent erosion of team potential through miscommunication. A project derails because expectations weren't clear. A talented team member disengages because they don't feel heard. A breakthrough idea dies in a meeting room because the emotional temperature was too charged for productive dialogue.

These aren't isolated incidents—they're symptoms of communication systems that haven't evolved to match the complexity of modern leadership challenges. But here's what we've discovered: when leaders master what we call value-building behaviours, they don't just improve communication, but instead they can transform their entire team’s dynamic.

The Hidden Cost Of Communication Drift

Before we explore the solution, let's acknowledge the reality. Poor communication doesn't announce itself with dramatic failures; it whispers through daily frustrations. Team members who nod in meetings but remain confused about priorities. Leaders who speak passionately but wonder why their vision isn't translating into action. Projects that technically succeed but leave everyone feeling disconnected from the purpose.

We've seen organisations where communication has become a series of transactions rather than transformations. Where information flows but understanding doesn't. Where teams are busy but not aligned, productive but not inspired.

The question isn't whether your team communicates. Of course they do, in one way or another. It's whether your communication creates value.

Eight Value-Building Behaviours To Build Communication Excellence

Based on our extensive work with leadership teams, we've recognised the value of eight core behaviours, originally identified by Aristotle and taught to Alexander the Great over 2000 years ago, that consistently transform communication from functional to transformational. These aren't just techniques—they're the building blocks of trust, understanding, and collaborative success.

1. Clarify & Contract: Setting The Foundation

Every meaningful conversation starts and ends with clarity. Before diving into the discussion, establish what success looks like. After reaching conclusions, ensure everyone understands their commitments.

The opening question that changes everything: "What will a successful outcome for this conversation look like?"

At the session's end, the ‘contract’ becomes crucial: who's doing what, by when, and how we'll measure progress? This simple practice prevents the common frustration of meetings that feel productive but generate no real action.

2. Active Listening And Observing: The Full-Spectrum Approach

True listening involves three dimensions: words, emotions, and unspoken signals. We think four to five times faster than people speak, which means our minds often wander when we should be fully present.

The game-changing behaviours:

• Remove all distractions—phones, laptops, everything that signals divided attention
• Listen for meaning, not just for your turn to speak
• Watch body language, which often communicates more than words
• Give thinking time, especially to introverts who process internally

Remember: behaviour breeds behaviour. When you give quality attention, you receive it in return.

3. Asking Open Questions: The Discovery Engine

Open questions beginning with "What," "How," "Why," "Where," "When," and "Who" promote discovery rather than mere compliance. Instead of telling people what to think, we invite them to think for themselves.

Transform your conversations by asking:

• "What do you think will be the consequences of this approach?"
• "How might you improve this situation?"
• "What have you learnt from this experience?"
• "Who can help you move forward?"

Critical warning: Avoid loaded questions like "Why are you always so negative?" which shuts down rather than opens up dialogue.

4. Summarising: The Understanding Check

High-performing leaders summarise every 8-12 minutes in conversations. This isn't just good practice—it's essential for ensuring that understanding is actually taking place rather than just information exchange.

Summarising serves three purposes: it confirms comprehension, refocuses energy, and demonstrates that you're genuinely listening. When people feel heard, they become more open to influence and collaboration.

5. Support: Building The Emotional Foundation

Verbal support isn't about false praise—it's about recognising effort, acknowledging perspective, and demonstrating understanding. This creates the emotional safety necessary for honest dialogue and constructive challenge.

Effective support language includes:

• "I agree with you that..."
• "I can see the positive impact that will have on..."
• "I fully support you in..."

Support encompasses encouraging, empathising, trusting, and reinforcing positive behaviours. It's the foundation that makes a meaningful challenge possible.

6. Challenge: The Growth Accelerator

Here's what most leaders miss: Effective challenge requires explicit permission. Label the fact that you're going to challenge an idea by saying, "Can I challenge that?" This gives both parties emotional space to engage constructively.

The balance between support and challenge defines your leadership signature. Too much support can shift competent staff into the "parking zone", potentially stifling their personal growth and generating ‘learnt helplessness’ where micromanaging their performance can lead to a ‘why bother’ attitude. Conversely, putting additional pressure on staff and giving them too much challenge without the necessary support can push them into the stress zone, creating a culture of fear and exhaustion.

Positive challenge behaviours include:

• Questioning assumptions
• Exploring alternatives
• Setting stretch goals
• Encouraging positive behaviours

7. Time Out: The Reset Button

Sometimes conversations reach emotional or cognitive overload. Calling "time out" (whether for five minutes or to reschedule) allows people to process, reflect, and return with better energy.

This isn't avoiding difficult conversations; it's ensuring they happen productively. Time out helps people to label their emotional state, moderate energy levels, and create space for reflection.

8. Review And Feedback: The Continuous Improvement Loop

Every significant interaction should end with a feedback exchange. This isn't just about giving feedback—it's about receiving it and using it to improve future communications.

Effective feedback principles:

• Focus on observable behaviour, not character judgements
• Be specific rather than general
• Provide timely input, as close to the event as possible
• Use descriptive rather than evaluative language
• End positively—sandwich challenging feedback between supportive comments

Research shows that negative feedback delivered supportively doesn't damage learning, whilst unsupported criticism significantly reduces performance.

Finally, another key thing to remember is that transforming team communication isn't about perfecting all eight behaviours simultaneously, but building capability systematically. We recommend approaching this like developing any new skill: start with one area, build consistency, then gradually expand.

The Evidence: When Value-Building Behaviours Transform Performance

Organisations that implement value-building behaviours systematically see measurable improvements in team dynamics and business results. Teams report higher engagement, faster decision-making, and more innovative problem-solving when these behaviours become standard practice.

Most importantly, people feel more connected to their work and each other. In a world where engagement levels remain persistently low, this isn't just beneficial—it's essential for sustainable success.

The fundamental question for every leader: Are your communication patterns creating the culture you want, or accidentally undermining it?

Your Communication Transformation Starts Now

Exceptional communication isn't an innate talent you're born with, but a capability you develop. Every conversation is an opportunity to practice value-building behaviours, and every meeting is a chance to strengthen trust and alignment.

The teams that will thrive in tomorrow's challenges aren't those with the best technology or the biggest budgets; they're the ones that have mastered the fundamentals of human connection and collaborative thinking.

At Morgan James Consulting, we don't just teach communication techniques. We help leaders build the behavioural foundations that make great communication inevitable. Because when you get communication right, everything else becomes possible.

Get in touch with us today and discover how value-building behaviours can transform your team's performance, engagement, and results.

Image Source: Canva